Lost and Found
by MoonShedTears
Summary: Fear and the subsequent silent fall-out between Chikane & HImeko after High School. They don't see or speak to each other again after five years, when they meet by chance in a science photo-shoot. They will have to face the reason for their rift and also the choices they've made in life that have brought them to where they are. This story is AU, OOC, and WTF. R&R to keep it going.
1. Chapter 1: Wasted Nights

I do not own KNM or any of its characters.

The initial poem is not mine. I found it years ago but I don't know who wrote it.

* * *

_Somewhere in the world_

_I am wondering where you are._

_And what your life is like._

_Though that would probably surprise you_

_As I left without much words or explanations._

_I left in the shadows._

_But it is true._

_There is this yearning that I hold silently_

_to at least know how you are._

_Though I will never act on it._

_It is the 'letting go' I have learned how to do in this life._

_Maybe my imaginations served me better._

_In the silence._

_While you will never see this, I think your heart would at least_

_intuitively know._

_Deep down past rational_

_News about you is headline to my heart._

_And if you are alive and well I am grateful._

_If you are not, I will deeply grieve._

_Alas,_

_What does it matter?_

_It just does._

Lost and Found

Chapter 1: Wasted nights

Eyes opened in the darkness, Chikane Himemiya finds herself staring up at nothingness. She shifts to one side to look at the alarm clock: 2:34 a.m.

She shifts again.

*Sigh*

"Another wasted night. Great." After the protest, Chikane got up from her bed and turned the light on. She looked about her. The bed, the small desk full of papers and books, the fan humming making the room cooler, the painting on the wall, the pale lilac color of her room. She became aware of her apartment. Of the TV-less living room, the black leather furniture, the small kitchen, the window, and the silence of the night.

This had become a habit.

Every summer vacation since starting at the university, Chikane found herself alone in her apartment, with nothing to do, and entertaining all sorts of thoughts. Every night she would try and go to sleep, and every night she ended up wide-awake, her brain racing as fast as a jet engine. A million thoughts crossed her head, some of them making no sense. She would think of food and weather, space, nature, magic, the rose gardens a block away from her place, her childhood, her schooldays, her friends, her piano.

The piano she used to play.

And this is where her brain slowed down and her thoughts became more concentrated.

"When did all of this begin?"

"I don't even recognize my reflection in the mirror."

"Hahaha. Just as cars go from zero to sixty in 2.5 seconds, my life went from sixty to zero just as fast."

Chikane then looked at the books adorning her room: Biology, Microbiology, Genetics, Microbial Physiology, Chemistry, Organic Chemistry, Analytical Chemistry, Biochemistry, Calculus, Differential Equations.

"Just in WHAT parallel universe does this make any sense?"

"..."

"Right. In any."

Chikane Himemiya's decision to study science took everyone by surprise, including her. It didn't make sense then, it doesn't make sense now. Back then, Chikane thought this was the best choice she'd made in her entire life. Only to discover that being 17 doesn't make you the wisest person on the planet. And now, about to enter her 5th and final year of college, Chikane now clearly understands the phrase "Follow you dreams." Because now, roughly 11 months from becoming a scientist, Chikane Himemiya is a miserable young lady.

"Funny", she tells herself, "how one moment, one single instant defines your life. That choice you make in fear, or confusion, and believe that it will free, or lessen everything you are. That perhaps becoming a scientist will make your parents really proud and society will stare in awe at your intelligence and achievements. That choosing this career will show that I am a capable human being, just like everybody else. That I have to follow some sort of path of greatness and keep that level of supremacy I had in school. Maybe people will not have time to think of anything else...not wander about my personal life..."

"But what triggered the choice? I know the answer. I have never said it out loud, but my mind screams it and it echoes in my head like a canyon."

After some seconds in silence, Chikane looked at the clock again.

5:00a.m.

"I'm rambling nonsense again. I'm going to bed and hopefully sleep this time around."

As Chikane plopped into her bed, she reached for her nightstand, and grabbed a manila envelope. She felt like looking at her entrance exam scores. But from the envelope, something fell. A picture. When she picked it up, the smiling face made her heart jump. After all these years, and nothing had really changed. The cause of her "wise" choice. The girl with blonde hair, kind amethyst eyes, and the smile that shines like the sun.

Chikane had sworn to not say her name out loud, but like the big traitor the heart is, it swayed the brain to give the signal and before she knew it, Chikane found herself muttering the name of the one who stole her heart and has yet to give it back.

"Himeko"

* * *

So, here it is. A story.

It would be nice if I could get some feedback.

Thanks,

MST


	2. Chapter 2: Are you happy?

You should imagine this story taking place in the '90's where technology was not as globalized.

Also, Chikane is middle class.

Thanks to those who read and showed interest.

* * *

Chapter 2: Are you happy?

"Where is she?"

"I'm pretty sure she said 3:30"

"It's usually me the one who's always running late."

Himeko couldn't help but smile at that last statement. She remembers all too well her days at her High School dorm. Waking up in the mornings is always hard. But for Himeko Kurusugawa, sleeping in was a sport. And she was a pro. And her roomate was not a fan. Makoto Saotome woke up at the crack of dawn every single day to train, since she was an athlete. And every morning Makoto would go do her workout routine, go back to the dorm, get dressed, and Himeko would be still snoring away in pure bliss. It was then that Makoto would have to start screaming at Himeko to wake up and harass her to hurry up. Himeko would find herself tumbling down the stairs, arms flailing from side to side, trying to keep up with her track and field athlete friend. For three full years this was their daily routine. Even on graduation day.

"Himeko!"

A call interrupted her thoughts and she recognized that voice even before turning around.

Walking towards her and a hand up in the air waving at her was her friend Makoto Saotome. Her athletic friend had not changed much, her brown hair, still short, although she didn't wear the green ribbon on the side of her hair as much. But everything was pretty much the same. Those turquoise eyes were still as vivacious as ever, her smile was contagious, the hop on her step, her toned body from all the training. It was all there, just like it had been when they were in High School. Himeko looked at her friend and knew that Makoto would age only in number, but not really physically.

"Mako! You made it!" said Himeko while hugging her friend, and then adding "Finally."

"Yeah, sorry about that" Makoto answered while scratching the back of her head. "I missed the train, so I had to wait for the next one."

"Oh, look at you. All irresponsible and stuff", said Himeko in a teasing tone.

"Hey! You're the queen of tardiness, so don't even dare to take off at me for being late." Makoto squinted her eyes trying to make it seem like she was serious, but immediately the two friends started laughing.

"Come. Let's catch up while we drink a nice cup of hot cocoa."

* * *

Sitting in a corner of _L'Internazionale _café, Himeko and Makoto sipped on their hot drinks. Himeko had decided on eating a mallorca, a Spanish sweet bread with powdered sugar on top, while Makoto ordered a panini with ham and Swiss cheese and a soda. Himeko thought that was not a snack, more like a lunch. But then again, Makoto was an athlete, and it was very certain that her friend would burn all of it off in no time. In fact, it is very probable that she is burning it off right now.

"So", Makoto started, "how's life, Himeko?"

"It's pretty good", the blonde smiled, "Things are starting to pick up."

"That's why you moved here after finishing with photography school?"

"Yeah. I opened a small studio and I live in the apartment above. You know, I'm still starting, so I need to make sure to work hard and establish myself here."

Makoto nodded, "That's true. And you told me that you also do freelance photography?"

"Yes", Himeko added, "I sometimes get hired by magazines or they see some of the pictures I took and they buy it to release it in their next publishing. And the subsequent royalties I get helps as well."

"Wow, you kinda rock", said Makoto giving her friend a big smile.

"Well Mako", Himeko replied, "As I said, I have to work really hard and make a name for myself."

Makoto took a bite of the panini "Yeah, but I bet it's the retro pictures you take that have people going all crazy for you, eh?"

Himeko gave a small laugh, "Yes! People mostly come here to get their picture taken with one of the antique cameras I have. I've been hired to do photo shoots on location. Just last week, I did a _Secret Garden _style photo shoot. It was super fun and the pictures are coming out beautifully."

"I'm really proud of you, Himeko."

"Thanks, Mako."

After a couple of minutes eating in comfortable silence, Himeko asked her friend about the track team.

"Well, I was made Team Captain, thank you very much." Makoto answered proudly.

"Really!? Oh my God! Mako, that is amazing!"

"Well, I am the national champion, after all. And you know what this means, right?"

"What?"

"I get to be in the Olympic Team."

Himeko's jaw dropped.

"...You're kidding."

"Why would I be?", answered Mako broadly smiling. "I mean, I think it's pretty logical to send their top runner to compete against other top runners from different nations."

"Wow, Mako. My friend's a star!"

"I know, right? And you'll be my official photographer!"

"Yeah, right."

"Himeko, I'm not kidding. If I get to go to the Olympics, I'm dragging you with me."

* * *

After some minutes of talking excitedly about the Olympics, Mako and Himeko finished up their respective snacks and stared off at the environment in the café. At one point a song accompanied by nothing more than a piano started playing.

_Take a look at my body  
Look at my hands  
There's so much here that I don't understand  
Your face say these promises  
Whispered like prayers  
I don't need them_

"Hey, Himeko..." Mako started a little absent minded.

"Yes?"

"Do you remember Chikane Himemiya?"

"...Yes, I do."

"Man, she played some mean piano, didn't she?"

_I'm the slow dying flower  
In the frost killing hour  
Sweet turning sour and untouchable_

Himeko answered dryly, "She did."

Makoto, who didn't seem to notice Himeko's subtle change in humor, continued "I mean, the way her fingers moved up and down that thing. It's not normal."

Himeko sighed, "Well Mako, she did practice a lot to get to that point. I'm sure a lot of people say the same thing about you when you run."

"I guess you have a point. Shocking, though, her decision to study science."

"Yeah..."

Silence comes between them once more.

_I need a lullaby  
A kiss good night  
Angel sweet love of my life  
Oh, I need this_

"So...what became of her?"

"I...I don't know."

"Bummer. Maybe she already graduated."

"And went to grad school."

"She has a Ph.D."

"And is a professor."

The two friends laughed a little at their exchange, but Himeko quickly became quiet.

"You used to be pretty good friends back in school."

"Yeah, I know. But you know how these things go. You basically lose contact with your schoolmates once you graduate high school."

"But you couldn't get away from me", said Mako with a mischievous smile on her face, to which Himeko replied "Couldn't do it even if I wanted to."

Makoto arched and eyebrow "Oh? I'm gonna take that as a compliment. And besides, I'm not the only one from school you couldn't get away from."

"Oh?" Himeko didn't quite get the statement.

"How's Souma?"

_Oh, right, Souma. My brain really is in space._

"He's fine. He's gone off to an engineering internship abroad."

Makoto smiled sweetly at Himeko. "That's nice. I'm glad you guys are still together, the High School Sweethearts!"

"Ah, Mako, don't embarrass me" Himeko said with a faint blush on her face.

"Look at you. All these years together and you still blush."

"You know how I am!"

"Yeah, yeah. By the way Himeko..." Makoto trailed off with a glint in her eyes.

"By the way, what?" Himeko was a little afraid of what Makoto would say next.

"Have you guys, well, done the deed yet?"

At this point Himeko was blushing furiously. "Makoto!" Himeko said her friends full name, "We haven't! You know how I feel about it..." Himeko trailed off, her voice fading away.

Makoto's laugh rang through the entire café. "Ok, ok. So you're still hanging on to the whole _when we get married_ thing. I just wanted to check. Because, you know, people change."

_People change_

"Well I haven't changed yet" Himeko replied sure of herself.

"You said _yet_. That's the spirit!" Makoto replied happily seeing Himeko blush again.

"You truly are insufferable" said Himeko looking away.

"And we're still friends." Makoto then added more seriously "Truly now, Himeko, I'm glad that you are happy. All of your wishes are slowly coming true."

_You better shut your mouth  
And hold your breath  
And kiss me now  
And catch your death_

"...Yeah."

* * *

Himeko arrived at ther apartment a little tired and decided to take a shower. Later she got on her favorite pijamas and sat down in front of the open double door overlooking the scenery. She took in a deep breath, letting the cool breeze of the night hit her face and calm her. She was happy. Himeko was able to see her dear friend and had a lovely afternoon catching up.

But something was nagging at the back of her head.

_Why did Makoto ask about Chikane all of a sudden? It's not like they were really close in school,_ Himeko thought.

"I wonder how you are, Chikane? I wonder if your 'dream' of becoming a scientist came true. But most importantly..."

"Are you happy, Chikane?"

* * *

So yeah, Chapter 2.

The verses used were fragments of the song My Skin by Natalie Merchant

Thoughts? Leave a review!


	3. Chapter 3: The Stage is Set

Hello. Thank you to those who are enjoying this story and have reviewed, favorited, and/or fallowed.

Tsubasa and Souma are not related here.

Chapter 3: The Stage is Set

*Ring*

"..."

*Ring*

"...Uhhh..."

*Ring*

"Damn it."

Chikane woke up at the sound of the telephone. Tumbling from her bed, she picked up the phone and groggily answered "Hello?"

"_Chikane, it's one in the afternoon. Why are you still in bed?"_ A female voice could be heard at the other end of the line.

"Wh...what?" Chikane cleared her throat, "No, I'm totally up."

"_Yeah, and I was born yesterday."_ The female voice answered in a very cold and sarcastic tone.

"Whatever. What do you want, Reiko?" Chikane replied albeit annoyingly.

"_Well, tomorrow the new semester begins. Our last year as college students. Are you excited?" _Reiko said in an unenthusiastic tone.

"Not as much as you" said Chikane, matching her friend's tone.

"_Yeah, well, Tsubasa and I are coming over. So you better have at least some water to offer us."_

"That's exactly what you'll get. See you tonight."

"_See you."_

* * *

Later that night, Chikane's friends, Reiko and Tsubasa, arrived at her apartment. Reiko was a woman of reddish brown hair and wore round glasses. Her serious and antisocial demeanor matched her sarcasm. On her free time she drew and that took her mind off the world. Then there was Tsubasa, a tall, mysterious green haired lad. Chikane and Reiko didn't know a whole lot about him, but it seems he enjoyed the martial arts. He has mentioned that he has a girlfriend, but neither Chikane nor Reiko have met said partner. Sometimes they wonder if he's saying the truth or if he's slightly schizophrenic.

Nevertheless, these were Chikane's friends. The one's she met on her first year in college. Although their first meeting wasn't as pleasant and smooth, they eventually figured that they understood each other and worked well together. Therefore, they started doing group projects together and hung out, since it seemed that nobody else was willing to get to know them.

"I think we got lucky", Tsubasa said while drinking some wine Chikane served, "that we get to work together on the same lab with Dr. Kazuki."

"That is true", replied Reiko, "given the fact that these things are decided via lottery."

"Or maybe they figured that it was easier to have the three of us together, since we don't seem to fit with anyone else." Chikane added while taking a sip of her glass of wine.

"Yeah, most likely."

"It makes sense."

The fact that Chikane was an outsider would shock many from her school, since everybody knew who she was. Chikane Himemiya was intelligent, talented, and well mannered. She had looks as well: long black hair, striking blue eyes, and was tall enough to do sports. But when she encountered people, she would come off as serious, cold, and uninterested. Therefore, people decided to interact with her as little as possible. It's not that she didn't want to meet new people and make friends, it's that it was hard for her to be outgoing from the get-go.

After some time in silence, Reiko asked "Have you guys any idea what you'll do after graduation?"

To which Chikane replied "Go on vacation?"

"Clever."

"Get a job and pay taxes, I guess", Tsubasa interrupted, "Isn't that the way it goes?"

"Yeah, guess you're right", both women agreed.

And they drank more wine.

* * *

Himeko sat in her small studio, looking at some of the stills she had taken during the week. While going through them, Himeko would look at each picture and decide if she liked it. If she did, she may put it on display to attract potential costumers or magazine owners. The day before, she had gone out walking and came across a junkyard, and there she saw a piano. This piano was ragged, old, dusty, and missing some keys. Himeko felt nostalgic when looking at the abandoned instrument. Its days of glory long gone.

It looked sad.

Himeko took out her camera and snapped a picture. She wasn't sure how it would come out. But now that she had the picture in her hand, Himeko loved it. The angle, the light, and the contrast. It was perfect. So she decided to keep it to herself. Himeko took the photo upstairs and put it up in a picture frame.

Her telephone rang.

"Hello? This is Kurusugawa. How may I help you?" Himeko answered in a polite tone.

"_Oh, Kurusugawa? This is Dr. Kazuki from Science University. I was wondering if you were available to do a photo shoot next week? I would like to have my student's pictures taken." _

"Of course. Do you want the pictures to be taken here or at the university?"

"_Would it be too much trouble to take the pictures here?"_

"No, not at all. You just have to tell me the location and I will get there early to set everything up."

"_Ok. I want you to come to the Biology Building and go to laboratory C-15."_

"Got it. I will go to the Biology Building to laboratory C-15 and set up early." Himeko repeated the information to assure that she had got it right.

"_Oh, Kurusugawa?"_

"Yes?"

"_Could you bring your antique camera? The pictures you take are really pretty and I would like to have my student's photos to look amazing."_

"Sure, no problem. I will see you then, Dr. Kazuki."

"_Alright. Goodbye, Miss Kurusugawa."_

After Himeko hung up, she wrote the appointment on her schedule and smiled to herself. Even scientists were aware of her job. Himeko felt proud of herself.

What both girls didn't know was that the stage was set for an encounter they were not counting on.

* * *

So, chapter 3.

Oh, look. Chikane is bff's with the necks.

Chikane & Himeko were featured in the same chapter. I call that progress.

I'm still working out all of the ideas in my head.

Thoughts? Comments? Preoccupations? Leave a comment.

Thank you,

MST


	4. Chapter 4: Through the Lens

Will there ever be a 5th season for Maria-sama ga Miteru?

As always, thank you for reviewing, following, and favoring =)

* * *

_And how dare that you send me that card  
When I'm doing all that I can do.  
You are forcing me to remember  
When all I want is to just forget you. _

~Rachael Yamagata

Chapter 4: Through the Lens

Science University buzzed with life. Students were walking towards their respective classes. Others met with their friends. Some sat in the cafeteria having breakfast.

The first day of term is always energetic and full of life. New admission students eager to prove their worth, older students seeing their friends after the summer vacations, and professors walking around with their teaching materials in hand. In the Biology Building, a group of students sat in Laboratory C-15, waiting for Dr. Kazuki to show up. There, Chikane, Tsubasa, and Reiko sat in a table on the far corner, not wanting to interact with their other lab mates.

"Good morning, students!" Greeted Dr. Kazuki cheerfully to his 10 students.

"Good morning, professor" Came the automatic reply from the students.

"Well, you could be a little more enthusiastic" said the professor, then adding "But no matter! Hopefully you will warm up as the semester progresses."

"I will never understand how Dr. Kazuki can be so cheerful all the time", said Reiko in her usual bored tone.

"Maybe he's on dope." Chikane suggested.

"Or maybe he's having awesome sex", offered Tsubasa.

"Lovely image, Tsubasa, thanks." Reiko answered sarcastically.

"Anytime."

Then, Dr. Kazuki's voice rang out once more "Before I forget, make sure to bring your best face next week, for I have hired a photographer to have your pictures taken."

*Gasp*

"Oh, my God!"

"That is so cool!"

"I need to get my hair done."

"I'm buying new clothes."

"Now, let me assign the lab duties."

On a table in the corner, three students looked on with confused looks on their faces.

* * *

*Ring*

"Hello? This is Kurusugawa."

"_Himeko? Hey, it's me."_

"Souma! Hey!"

Himeko was going over some pictures she had to deliver and checking her next appointment when her phone rang.

"_How are you, Himeko? How are things going?"_ Souma's voice came quietly through the receiver of the phone.

"Things are going great! You know, just working."

"_Ah, that's great to hear. I'm proud of you."_

"Yeah, thanks", Himeko replied awkwardly. "So how is the internship going?"

"_It's going well. We were learning algorithms to write video games. It was a pretty amazing workshop." _

"I'm glad that you are having fun and learning. You would talk nonstop about the importance of this internship, so I'm very happy that you got it."

"_Yeah, well, I couldn't have done it without your support."_

Himeko blushed and replied "Ahhh, Souma, you give me too much credit."

"_I'm serious, Himeko" _Souma countered. _"You truly are an amazing girlfriend and I couldn't be luckier."_

"Well...If you say so, then." Himeko found herself unable to give another reply.

"_Anyways, I have to hang up. It's getting late and I need to be up early tomorrow. Talk to you later, ok?"_

"Ok. Take care."

"_Love you."_

"Yeah, me too."

*beep*

After Himeko hung up, she threw herself back on the chair. She always had trouble saying 'I love you'. It made her feel odd. That if she actually said it, it would be like cementing her future with Souma.

Because something that Himeko has not admitted yet, is that she has never been absolutely sure she wants to be with Souma in a lasting relationship.

* * *

The day of the photo shoot finally came and Himeko got to the university very early. She told Dr. Kazuki that she wanted to take a look at the place and then set everything up accordingly. Himeko had found a nice angle where she could take the picture and include the tables, microscopes, flasks, incubators, and other equipment as backdrop for the students. Just as she was moving around getting everything ready, Dr. Kazuki approached her "Is this ok, Kurusugawa? Anything you need?"

"Everything's fine, thank you. I'll let you know if I need something." Himeko replied while adjusting the height of her camera.

"Alright, the students will be here soon."

* * *

"Looking good, Chikane", Tsubasa teased as Chikane approached him and Reiko.

"Shut up" came her dry reply.

"You know, Chikane, it seems you got into photography mood. You came all dressed up", Reiko noted while looking at Chikane's ensemble.

"I only dressed up because I think one needs to look presentable in these things", Chikane replied starting to get annoyed.

Chikane's ensemble was quite simple, but sophisticated. She was wearing a black summer dress that ended just above her knees. There was a small cut that showed a small part of her back. She wore simple black shoes with a slight heel. Her long hair, falling all the way to her bottom, and some light makeup that made her blue eyes seem even more striking than usual.

As the three friends entered the lab, Chikane was about to enter the workstation area when Dr. Kazuki ordered them to gather in the small conference room, failing to notice the blonde woman who was rummaging about. Inside the room, the rest of the students seemed excited, and some girls were looking at their faces and applying some powder and lipstick. Just as the students were talking and applying finishing touches, the professor walked in.

"Good morning, everyone. Looking good, looking good! Now, the photographer has everything set up and we'll all go in and take a group photo. Later, she will take your individual pictures. Any questions?"

"No" came the automatic reply from the students.

"Alright, then. Let's do this."

* * *

As the students walked in and settled on the chairs that had been arranged for them, Himeko was under the curtain of the camera, her face hidden from the people in front of her. She wanted to see if the set-up worked well with the illumination and angle. As the last three students settled in, Himeko saw a familiar figure. Through the lens, she paralyzed as she recognized the tall woman with black hair and commanding blue eyes.

Himeko's brain stopped.

In front of her was Chikane Himemiya, staring right at the camera and occasionally exchanging words with some classmates. She wasn't counting on this, and Himeko had no idea what to do next. She felt like staying under that curtain forever or run away, or just disappear right then and there. Just as she weighed her farfetched options, Dr. Kazuki's voice interrupted her.

"Ready when you are."

"..." No reply came back.

Confused, Kazuki offered "Everything ok, Kurusugawa?"

This time, it was Chikane's thoughts that were cut short.

"Kurusugawa!?" Chikane's neck almost snapped as she moved her head to the side, giving Dr. Kazuki a bewildered look. Tsubasa and Reiko exchanged confused looks. Then looked at Chikane. Then looked at the professor. Then looked at the camera. Finally, looking at Chikane again.

"Yes, Kurusugawa is the photographer. You've heard of her?" The professor seemed to be unaware of the sudden shift in the atmosphere.

Chikane could not answer. She could not believe her ears.

"_This has to be a different Kurusugawa. Please, let it be a different Kurusugawa." _Chikane prayed like never before.

But her prayers went unanswered.

From behind the curtain of the camera, a slender figure emerged. For the first time in five years, dark blue and amethyst connected once more.

* * *

Souma anyone? Anyone?

Comments? Thoughts? Confused? Leave a review.

Thanks,

MST


	5. Chapter 5: Nothing to Say

If I owned Kannazuki no Miko, episode 8 would have never happened.

Thanks for reading and leaving some great reviews ;)

Guys, before I forget. The new semester is about to start. And you know what this means. My priorities will shift and updates will not be as frequent as I'd like them to be.

* * *

Chapter 5: Nothing to Say

Chikane was about to faint.

It took every bit of energy not to faint.

From behind the curtain of the camera emerged the figure of Himeko Kurusugawa, her amethyst eyes staring back in equal shock.

Chikane could really not believe she was seeing Himeko, and the weird circumstances in which they were. For you see, Chikane always thought that if she saw Himeko ever again, she would be angry. She would give Himeko a piece of her mind. Chikane would say all the things she's been meaning to say. But there were a couple of issues at play here. First, Chikane sat in a small room full of people and it would be really bizarre if she just started screaming things at Himeko. Secondly, and perhaps the most important, is that Chikane cannot find it in her to be angry. At least not at the moment. She looked at Himeko and took in every bit of her.

Chikane's mouth was slightly agape.

"_Bless my soul"_

Himeko was wearing a pastel colored skirt, showing off her legs and a turquoise sleeveless hoodie. Then Chikane focused on Himeko's hair.

"_Oh, your hair"_

Himeko had cut her hair shoulder length. The big red bow long gone and was now replaced by a smaller, more delicate white ribbon holding part of her hair.

And then Chikane focused on Himeko's face once more. Her facial features pretty much the same as those years ago, but you could tell that Himeko had matured. Her baby fat now gone but her face still exuding kindness. But it was Himeko's eyes, those amethyst eyes that Chikane found herself lost in. Then Chikane noticed that Himeko was wearing glasses.

"_Good God"_

All thought disappeared.

* * *

Himeko was not a girl who dealt well with surprises.

She usually passed out, blushed or got pale, or did something stupid. So for Himeko to have Chikane Himemiya in front of her, it took every ounce in her body not to pass out. But she knew she was as pale as a human being could get. This was just not expected. Himeko did wander every now and then how Chikane was doing, but she never really considered what she would do if she ever crossed paths with the blue eyed girl. Now Chikane was sitting in a chair right in front of her looking like a deer caught in the headlights of a truck.

"_Remember to breathe, Himeko"_

Seeing Chikane there, Himeko wandered if time had really passed. Chikane's hair was the same length, her eyes as intense as the ocean itself. Himeko was trying to get a read of Chikane's eyes. Of course, she looked surprised, but there was something else that Himeko could not quite pinpoint. And now she could not look away.

For both girls, this moment seemed to have lasted forever, but in reality this all took but mere seconds.

It was Chikane who broke the silence by answering Kazuki's question. "Yes, professor. We used to be schoolmates."

"Oh, that is amazing! What a lovely surprise, isn't it?", the professor added delighted.

Chikane did not answer his question. Instead, she said "We should take the picture, other students have classes soon."

"You're right, you're right. Kurusugawa, could you please?"

"Ye...yes. Of course", came the weak reply.

Himeko got behind the camera, adjusted it a little and said "Ok, on the count of three...One, two, three."

Chikane looked intently at the camera.

*Snap*

*Flash*

"Ok. All done."

Kazuki looked at his students and said "Alright, guys. Now, we'll all go into the conference room and take turns with the individual shots."

"_Oh, shit. I forgot about that."_

"Chikane", Kazuki's voice interrupted her thoughts, "You should go first, since you and Kurusugawa know each other. You girls can catch up if you'd like", the professor added cheerfully.

Chikane's face was full of disdain and Himeko was pale and her face full of dread. Everybody made their way out.

They were now alone.

* * *

Back in the conference room, Tsubasa and Reiko huddled in a corner.

"Is it me or is there tension between Chikane and that photographer?" asked Reiko.

Tsubasa agreed "Yeah, there is definitely something. Maybe they had a disagreement when they were classmates?"

"Maybe. Do you think we should ask her about it?"

"Hmmm. Maybe we should wait and see. Get a feel of the atmosphere."

* * *

In the working station, Chikane and Himeko stared at one another.

Dead silence.

Chikane finally broke the silence. "Where should I sit?" Her voice void of emotion.

"Uhhhh...You...You can sit on that chair over there...", Himeko answered clearly nervous, "...and I'll move the ones next to it." Himeko rushed to move the chairs while Chikane graciously sat on a chair in the middle.

Himeko wasn't sure what to do next so she ventured "So, uhh, how are you?"

"Fine", came the Chikane's dry reply.

"Long time no see, huh?" Himeko tried again.

"You would know a thing or two about that."

The acid reply cut like shrapnel through Himeko.

"_This is getting uncomfortable."_

"Let me know when you're ready to take the picture, as I am already in place." Chikane sounded as she was dismissing Himeko and uninterested in having a conversation with her. Even though she felt a little hurt, Himeko decided to confront Chikane.

"You know, I just wanted to have some small talk."

Chikane looked at Himeko amused and angry at the same time. "Small talk? I'm even surprised you want to TALK at all. Since you seem so good at not talking."

"_Ah, there's the anger I've been looking for."_

"What do you mean? I just want to know how you're doing, because we haven't seen each other in quite a while", Himeko replied frustrated.

"Oh, and I wonder how that happened?" Chikane's retort was full of sarcasm. Now that she had started, Chikane decided to continue. "So now you want to talk? Is this how you play the game? You talk to me and be friends with me, then out of the blue decide to stop talking to me and wait five years to do so again? Tell me because I clearly did not get the instructions manual. There is really nothing to say." Chikane finished, anger evident in her voice and face.

Himeko was not expecting Chikane to go at her like that. Her face was pale and she had no idea how to react. She felt like crying, like screaming, like running away from that place. But there she was, with a shocked face and Himemiya looking at her as if sending a million curses at her. With the little energy she had left, Himeko walked up to the camera, got behind it, and said "I'll take the picture now."

Chikane sat up straight and tried to compose herself as best as she could and looked at the camera. At the same time, Himeko steadied herself under the curtain of the old camera and signaled with her fingers...3...2...1.

*Snap*

*Flash*

"All done."

Chikane wavered for a second when she heard Himeko's voice. It sounded weak and broken, like the voice of someone who was about to cry. But she got up from the chair and as she walked out, she said "Good day, Kurusugawa."

Behind the camera, a tear made its way down a certain blondes face.

* * *

Chikane entered the conference room and Dr. Kazuki asked "All done catching up, Himemiya?"

"Yes" her tone did not go unnoticed to Tsubasa and Reiko. When Chikane sat down beside them, Tsubasa commented, "You don't look like you're in an agreeable mood." Reiko looked on with intent. There was a momentary pause before Chikane said, "Hey, we don't have homework or have to study for anything right now. Why don't you guys come over tonight and watch movies and drink some wine?"

Tsubasa and Reiko agreed. They could feel something was about to happen.

* * *

So, Chapter 5

...At least they spoke to one another...right?

As always, if you have any thoughts, comments, worries. Leave a review.

Thanks,

MST


	6. Chapter 6: Kiss them Away pt1

_ENJOY! _

* * *

_If the elephants have past lives_

_Yet are destined to always remember_

_It's no wonder how they scream_

_Like you and I, they must have some temper_

~ Rachael Yamagata

Chapter 6: Kiss them Away pt.1

It is said that, when angry, you will give the best speech you'll ever regret. That's exactly how Chikane Himemiya felt. After her confrontation with Himeko, Chikane felt miserable. Guilty. She was frustrated because she spoke her mind, but now she felt bad about it.

"_I gave her a piece of my mind. Isn't that what I wanted to do in the first place?"_ Chikane wandered this while in some class she wasn't paying attention to. As the professor moved along in the subject, Chikane's mind drifted between being angry, feeling bad, and remembering every detail of Himeko. Something Chikane didn't want to acknowledge at the moment was that deep in her heart, she was glad to see the blonde girl again. Her head was a mess, her heart in turmoil. Chikane was not sure what this all meant or what to do next. She now knew what Himeko was doing with her life. She had followed her dream and became a photographer. She had to scoff at that thought. It made her even more frustrated and angry.

"_Here I am, not following my dreams because of her and Himeko followed hers and is clearly doing well. This makes me feel even more stupid." _Chikane sat back on her chair and smiled sarcastically to herself.

"_Damn. Am I screwed up or what?"_

* * *

Himeko felt tired. The day had been anything but great. As she entered her apartment, she threw her things on the floor and laid on the couch. Himeko tried to think of the events that happened: She saw Chikane. Chikane was not happy to see her. They had an awkward encounter. Himeko ended up crying.

She felt like crying again.

Himeko passed a hand through her face and sighed. "Should I call Mako", Himeko wandered, "But if I call her, what am I going to say?"

*Sigh*

Himeko decided that she was too tired to do anything right now and preferred on taking a nap. Maybe she'll feel better once she's rested.

* * *

Tsubasa and Reiko knocked on the door and were greeted by a red faced Chikane.

"Hey guys", Chikane greeted a little too cheerfully, "you're late."

"Seems to me you started the party early", countered Tsubasa.

"It's never too early to party."

Reiko and Tsubasa exchanged looks and knew that this was going to be an interesting night. Inside Chikane's apartment, bottles of wine were out and some boxes were in the middle of the living room. Reiko looked around with a confused expression and asked, "So, did you invite us over to help you clean or something?"

Chikane came over with two glasses of wine, handed them over to Tsubasa and Reiko and replied, "No, not at all. We're just going to drink some wine, chill out, and talk."

"Ok then", Tsubasa started, "what are the boxes for?"

"Oh, these are just some old stuff of mine."

Chikane's two friends were still clearly confused. Reiko sat down on the couch and asked, "So, what movie are we watching?"

Chikane looked up seriously to her friends and said, "It's called 'Me'"

"Ummm, what?" both friends asked confused.

"You'll see, you'll see." Chikane removed a VHS cassette from the box and Tsubasa and Reiko realized that it was one of those home movies.

"Oh, good God, Chikane", Reiko started in disdain, "please stop drinking."

"Guys, we really know nothing about each other outside of college. This could be a great way to get to know our true selves." Chikane responded.

"I cannot believe that just came out of your mouth", Tsubasa commented.

Chikane made a frown and put the cassette on the VHS player. On the screen, a solitary piano sat in the middle of a stage. Then, a young girl, perhaps 15 or 16 years old approached the instrument. The audience erupted into applause. Finally, the raven-haired girl sat in front of the piano and placed her fingers on top of the keys and began to play.

Tsubasa and Reiko could only stare.

The video was of a young Chikane Himemiya playing Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata op 27 #2 Movement 3, also known as Presto Agitato, just as skillfully as Wilhelm Kempff. Her fingers seemed to be gliding through the keys, barely touching them. Everything in that performance was a graceful choreography of fingers, rhythm, concentration, and years of practice. The sustain pedal, pressed precisely at the right times to give the piece the intensity or the tranquility that it needed. Chikane's face was sometimes soft; sometimes she would slightly frown, and close her eyes as she played along. She concluded the piece with an ascending and descending cluster of notes reaching a crescendo. It was perfect.

When the playing stopped Tsubasa and Reiko were looking on with their mouths open. They could not believe their eyes.

"You play the piano!?" Tsubasa asked in absolute shock.

Chikane, who was sitting on the floor next to the box answered, "Yeah. A damn virtuoso." She took another gulp from her glass.

"Soooo...what happened? I'm pretty sure you were poised to go to a music conservatory", Reiko asked looking at Chikane quizzically.

From the box in front of her, Chikane pulled a photo album and handed it to her friends. Reiko and Tsubasa studied the photo album and immediately noticed that the majority of the pictures were of Chikane and a certain blonde-haired girl.

"Hey", Tsubasa started, "this is the photographer from this morning." And even though he had a hunch of the answer, he asked anyways "What went on with the two of you?"

Chikane sat in silence for a while, her face serious. Then, she gave a lopsided smile and answered, "I fell in love."

* * *

"_I wish I could kiss them away."_

Himeko woke up with a start.

She looked around and realized she fell asleep on the couch. Her heart was beating fast and she took a tentative hand and touched a spot just behind her shoulder. Himeko closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I dreamt of a memory." Once she got up from the couch, she looked at her camera and remembered what had happened earlier in the day. Another deep breath.

"I thought I let go."

* * *

Silence.

Awkward silence.

Chikane's confession made the room fall into dead silence. Neither Reiko nor Tsubasa were sure how to react or what to say next. The three of them sipped on their wine while each reflecting on this new information. Reiko then decided to break the silence and asked, "You confessed? That's why you're not talking?"

"No, I did not confess."

"Ok, then. So what did you do?"

"I guess I got too close for comfort." Chikane took a gulp of wine and threw her head back on the couch. "It happened at a sleepover..."

* * *

_Chikane Himemiya sat quietly in the school library. She went over her English homework as she patiently waited for Himeko to come along from her tutoring sessions. The poor girl was just not good at math. Chikane decided that they should have a sleepover at her house to help Himeko prepare for their upcoming exam. And also, it meant that the blonde-haired girl would sleep right next to her. She felt excited there was no denying. Chikane had been helping Himeko out for quite some time now but she'd never had her sleepover. As a matter of fact, Himemiya was known for not bringing people to her house. Before, she would meet with Himeko outside of school in the public library or cafes near their houses. And even though Chikane was a collected girl she could not help the smile that formed on the lips. She was happy. Just knowing that Himeko would be sleeping beside her made her the happiest teenager in the whole world. _

_She loved her. _

_She loved Himeko and she wasn't sure when or how it happened. But now she knew it and she didn't want to let go of this feeling even though it scared her. _

_It was forbidden. _

_But she fell so elated whenever Himeko was around that she would forget of anything anyone preached and let her heart soar. Chikane didn't want this feeling to end. _

"_Chikane", a voice interrupted her thoughts. Himemiya opened her eyes and Himeko was standing in front of her smiling sweetly, "It looked like you were having a nice dream." _

"_I was", Chikane returned the smile. "Shall we go?" _

_Later that night, after some hours of studying quadratic equations, the girls agreed that it was time to rest. Chikane took a shower first and when she finished, she told Himeko she would get the bed ready while the other showered. Himeko, being the forgetful girl she is, took only her towel and underwear, leaving her pajamas behind. Once she finished, and noticed her faux pas, Himeko berated herself for her forgetfulness. _

_Chikane saw Himeko walk into the room wrapped in her towel and her heart skipped a beat. "Himeko? Where are your clothes?"_

"_Oh, sorry, I left them behind. I'm going to get them now", Himeko answered sheepishly. As Himeko crossed the room, since her towel was loosely wrapped around her, it fell. Chikane couldn't help but look at Himeko. But what she saw made her freeze in place. _

_Scars._

_Himeko's back had scars. Some were small while others spanned from one side of her back to the other. Chikane was trying to make sense of what she was seeing. Himeko had never mentioned that she had scars. Maybe this explained Himeko's reluctance to go to the pool or the beach. _

_When Himeko tried to put the towel back on, Chikane stopped her and asked, "Himeko...what is this? What happened? Please, tell me." Her voice was full of concern. _

_At this point, Himeko was standing awkwardly wearing nothing more than her undergarments. She stayed with her back to Chikane and took a deep breath before starting, "You know that I live with my grandmother, right?"_

"_Yes"_

"_Well, when my parents died, I originally went to live with an uncle. When he took me in it seemed that everything would be all right. But...but soon her started hitting me. Whenever I did something wrong, he would hit me...or sometimes he would come home drunk and then he would beat me as well...", she continued "So, after a while the authorities were notified and I was moved with my grandmother", Himeko finished in a weak tone. _

_Chikane stood in silence. She was dumbfounded by what Himeko had just told her. How could anyone hurt the blonde girl? How could someone even think about it? _

_Chikane did not have the answer. She felt angry, sad, confused, hurt. She wanted to somehow turn back time and get her hands on Himeko's uncle before he could do anything to her. Suddenly, a more disturbing thought occurred to her and she couldn't stop herself from asking: "Himeko, did he...did he molest you?", Chikane said this last part as a whisper. _

"_No!", Himeko's quick answer came, "He never did anything like that. Really, it's ok. I'm fine now. I'm living with my grand...", Himeko was cut short._

_Chikane scarcely knew what she was about, but she moved towards Himeko and hugged the girl from behind. Himemiya wrapped her arms around Himeko's stomach and brought her close. A million volts were going up and down Chikane's body at the touch of the blonde girl's skin. _

"_No", she said._

"_No. You didn't deserve this, Himeko, and it is not fine." Chikane sounded clearly upset. _

"_It is not fine because you are a great human being and it breaks my heart that you had to go through that on your own. No one, not one single child should go what you went through." _

_Chikane rested her head on Himeko's shoulder and whispered softly, "I wish...I wish I could kiss them away."_

_And then Chikane kissed a scar that started just at the back of Himeko's shoulder. _

* * *

When Chikane finished telling the story, Reiko and Tsubasa sat wide-eyed and drank some wine.

"Whoa", Tsubasa offered.

"That was bold", Reiko added. "Then Himeko stopped talking to you after that night?"

Chikane pondered this for a moment and answered, "After that night she gradually started to avoid me. All of a sudden she had study groups to attend to or she would volunteer to work on some activity or she would sit with...", a dark expression crossed her face, "she would sit with other people during lunch."

The three friends stayed in silence once more.

After a couple of minutes of silent drinking, Tsubasa said, "Sorry you lost a friend."

Chikane smiled sadly and answered, "Yeah, I guess I ended up kissing her away."

And they drank some more.

* * *

Oh, so that's what happened?

Remember, this is Chikane's side of the story.

Later!

MST


	7. Chapter 7: Change of Heart

Hello awesome people of the world. Here is Chapter 7. It's not that great, but I wanted to introduce a character.

Again, thank you for reading, following, reviewing, fav., and whatever else you can do here.

Also, October is getting near...which means I'm about to enter the spiral of impending doom here at school. Between classes, labs, research project, and the usual student "what after graduation" crisis, it will be very hard for me to update...I may be MIA 'till X-mas break. So hang in there, be patient, and you can wonder WTH is going to happen in this story.

Now, enjoy =)

* * *

Chapter 7: Change of Heart

Himeko's phone rang.

The blonde placed the album she was creating on top of the table and answered.

"Hello?"

"_Heeey, Himeko!_" The cheerful voice at the other end made Himeko smile.

"Hi, Mako! What a surprise!"

"_I had some free time, so I decided to check up on you."_

"I'm fine. Working hard, as always." Himeko then considered what she had thought of the other day, so she added, "You won't believe who I saw the other day at Science University."

"_Why were you there to begin with?"_ Mako stated with confusion.

"Because I had a photo shoot there for a lab group."

"_Ok, then. So who did you see?"_

There was a moment of silence.

"_Himeko?"_

"Chikane. I saw Chikane Himemiya."

"_...Whoa, really? She's still there?"_

"Yes, she's still there. And she looks exactly as she did in school, only a bit more mature. But everything else is just the same. She hasn't aged one bit."

"_Oh, wow. So I would recognize her if I we crossed each other on the street."_

"Yup."

"_So, how did she react? You guys hadn't seen each other in so long."_

"Well...", Himeko remembered the unfriendly encounter, "...let's just say she didn't seem all that excited to see me."

"_Oh? She wasn't happy?"_

"I don't know, Mako. The whole encounter was very awkward and uncomfortable. I mean, yes she looks the same. At least physically, but it seems her personality has changed." Himeko sounded frustrated and Makoto noticed.

"_Maybe she's like that because something happened between the two of you?"_

"What do you mean?"

"_Look, Himeko. You and Himemiya used to be really good friends. You guys would have lunch together, study together, and just hang out. Then all of a sudden you aren't as close anymore." _Noticing Himeko's silence, Makoto added, _"Yes, Himeko, even I noticed that you two had a falling-out. And I don't know why or how it happened or whose fault is it, but whatever it was seems to have Himemiya still upset. Because I have a feeling that you guys have not talked about it."_

Himeko was shocked. She had no idea that Makoto knew all along and her guess was pretty much right on the money.

"It's a long story, Mako..."

"_It's ok, you don't have to tell me what happened. But if Himemiya's friendship means that much to you, you should really talk to her about it and clear the air between you guys."_

Himeko smiled to herself. This was one of the reasons she loved her friend. Makoto was understanding enough not to push her into saying what happened, but was sensitive enough to give her some advice.

"Thanks, Mako. I will consider it. I really want to talk to her again, you know."

"_Well, then. Go get 'em, tiger!"_

"We'll talk later, ok?"

"_Sure thing. Take care! And don't work too hard!"_

"Thanks, you too. Bye."

"_Bye"_

After she hung up, Himeko returned to the table where she picked up the photos she was arranging. They were the ones she took in the lab. As she finished arranging them, Himeko picked the solo picture of Chikane. Himeko laughed sarcastically, because even when pissed off, Chikane looked as beautiful as ever in the picture. But upon close inspection, Himeko noticed that Chikane's eyes were not particularly angry.

"...They're gone...expressionless."

This made Himeko sad...and guilty. She knew this all started that night, when she suddenly stopped talking to her friend. But now they had crossed paths once more and she didn't know what to do.

* * *

"You're a lesbian."

"What?"

Chikane looked up at Tsubasa slightly confused.

Ever since Chikane's confession, the three friends had fallen into a pattern of awkward silence. They would sit in the cafeteria and eat quietly or chat absentmindedly about what they had to do in the lab. After that night, neither Tsubasa nor Reiko was sure how to talk or what to talk to Chikane about. Sure, they both were fine with Chikane's apparent sexuality, but they did not know how to approach the subject or show support. Therefore, Tsubasa decided to point out the obvious and start the conversation from there.

"I said you're a lesbian."

"Thanks for pointing out the obvious. I had not noticed."

Chikane's icy tone did not bother Tsubasa, so he continued, "Yeah, and this puts you in a totally different light."

"I'm not following."

"It means, Chikane", Reiko started, "that you're really a different person than the one we met about 5 years ago."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are!" This time, Tsubasa sounded a bit excited. "Look, you're like the ultimate college student. You're a girl, you're pretty, and you're gay. You have all the makings of the coolest person in this joint."

Chikane looked at Tsubasa with a pure WTF expression on her face.

"Chikane", Reiko started, "it's true that in the outside world gays don't have it as easy. But in the world of Academia, this kinda makes you a rock star."

"You guys are talking nonsense."

"Nonsense?" Tsubasa looked at Chikane with an arched eyebrow. "You see that table over there?" Tsubasa pointed at a table to their right, "That table is full of lesbians, and they're yours for the taking."

Chikane stared wide-eyed at her two friends, not believing the exchange they were having. Nonetheless, she decided to look at the table in question. Sure enough, it was full of young women, and some directed surreptitious glances towards Chikane. One thing she did not have clear, though...

"How do you know they're lesbians?"

This time, it was Reiko who answered, "Oh c'mon, take a good look at them. I don't want to get into stereotypes, but they exude gayness. You have the short-haired butch over there, the lipstick lesbian, and the femme over there."

This time Chikane took a good look at the group of girls. Yes, they did look a bit different than other chicks. And then Chikane set her eyes on a blonde-haired girl with green eyes who was also staring back at her. They stared at one another for a couple of seconds before Chikane broke eye contact.

"I have no idea how you got all those terms, but I'll take your word for it."

"Hey, there's a gay bar not far from here...Mattachine, I believe. You should go sometime. Maybe you'll meet some nice lady, you know." Tsubasa suggested.

"No, I think I'll pass. You know that I don't go out that much."

"Well, if you change your mind, let us know."

Chikane then took another glance at the table and the blonde girl looked up and smiled.

* * *

"Himemiya!"

Chikane looked up from her workbench to see Dr. Kazuki standing by the door with a slip of paper on his hand.

"I would like you to go and pick up the pictures from Kurusugawa's studio."

"What?"

"I said I would like you to go and pick up the pictures from Kurusugawa's studio."

Chikane sometimes wondered if the professor was really that incapable of picking up on moods.

"Yeah, sure. When?"

"This afternoon. I already told her I'd be sending one of the students. Here you have the address and also the check to pay for the pictures."

"Ok, I'll bring the pictures in the morning."

"_Damn it"_

* * *

Himeko sat in her studio, bored. It had been a slow day and she was waiting for a student to come and pick up the pictures so she could then close for the day. While waiting, Himeko decided to go upstairs to get a snack. By the time she got to the kitchen, someone walked into the studio and she called out "I'll be right down with you!"

And then she heard it.

A crash.

Shattering of glass.

Hurried footsteps leaving the studio.

"_Oh my God! I've been robbed!"_

Himeko rushed down the stairs only to find that everything was pretty much in place.

Except for a picture frame that laid broken on the floor.

When Himeko picked it up, she noticed that it was the picture of her and Souma that had been thrown to the ground. Next to it, a piece of paper that had the order number and specifications of the job. It was for the pictures she took at Science University. Himeko now had a pretty good idea who Dr. Kasuki sent to pick up the album.

* * *

Chikane was fuming.

She was walking down the street absolutely angry. It was her intention to be nice to Himeko this time around. To be a grown up and to be mature. But no. She had to see the picture of Himeko and Souma and she just lost it. As she walked into her apartment, Chikane picked up the phone and dialed Tsubasa.

"Hey, Tsubasa. I've had a change of heart. I think I want to go to this Mattachine place you told me about."

* * *

Green-eyed blonde! =D I couldn't leave her out!

I hate my neighbours...but that's not your fault so I don't blame you.

If you have any thoughts, please leave a comment!

MST


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